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    Team USA Tells Athletes To Identify As Chinese Before Going To Olympics

    Team USA is preparing it’s athletes before sending them to Beijing in a few weeks to compete in the Olympics by telling them to...

    Indian Man Gets 100 Covid Shots — Says Has Cured His Baldness

    Retired postman, Brahmde Mandin, 65, has revived 100 doses of the vaccine in Bihar state, which was verified by health officials. Mandin has never tested...

    UN To Ban Santa — Says Magical Reindeer Farts Cause Global Warming

    UNITED NATIONS — A day after Santa completed yet another magical mission of delivering joy and happiness to thousands of kids all over the...

    New CCP Face Mask Prevents Words From Coming Out

    The new Chinese W95 face mask called Sense-Sure not only prevents most large viruses from getting in, but keeps all words from getting out. “We...

    Germany Rebuilds The Berlin Wall And Moves Unvaccinated People To West Berlin

    EAST BERLIN — Germany announced that they have begun re-construction of the Berlin Wall to protect its people from Covid-19. Outgoing Chancellor Angela Merkel said...

    Megatron Unleashes Omicron On The World

    Authorities around the world have shut down travel once again, but this time for a new variant of the evil Decepticons, named Omicron. First spotted...

    Man Digs 5 Mile Tunnel To Smuggle KFC Into Auckland For Thanksgiving Dinner

    AUCKLAND, NEW ZEALAND — Harold Jones, a lifetime resident of Auckland, spent the last year digging a 5 mile long tunnel in order to...

    Scientist Warn Global Warming Could Destroy The Cloud

    A U.N. climate panel reported this morning that global warming is dangerously close to spiraling out of control. The exhaustively detailed 1 page report...

    Biden Says Trust Me: Global Warming Causes People To Nap More

    GLASGOW, SCOTLAND — President Joe Biden has suffered from a nap during the COP26 Climate Summit. “I will be handling this press conference as the...

    Biden Says More Oil Production Needed To Curb Global Warming

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — This morning President Biden announced an ambitious plan in the fight against global warming. “Yesterday I issued a call to OPEC to...

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