Wednesday, June 12, 2024

    China Hires Millions Of Police To Stop Kids From Playing Video Games

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    BEIJING, CHINA — President Xi Jinping called for two million police officers to stop kids from playing video games.

    “We must beat America. How do we do that — we stop our kids from playing video games and educate them so that they can take all the American college spots away from their own citizens,” stated President Jinping this morning. “While American children are playing video games our children will be preparing to take over their County by educating their minds. We cannot educate their kids if they have happiness playing video games.”

    Chinese parents hail the new law that prohibits their kids from playing any game both electronic or board. Meanwhile Spaghetti Thumbs has learned that production of video games in China has doubled with all output being exported to America.

    Smart phones have also been removed from the hands of kids and replaced with tin cans and strings. However, schools have reports a rise in phone injuries as kids have become tangled in the communication lines.

    Nonprofit organizations in America have responded to the problem by sending care packages that consist of fortune cookies that have all the fortunes printed with the message: “Inspire change.”

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