Thursday, June 13, 2024

    Dealership Fires Air Dancer For Failing To Get Vaccinated

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    SAN FRANCISCO, CA — A dealership located in downtown San Francisco fired its air dancers Tuesday for failing to get vaccinated.

    The two air dancers, Fling and Flang, have been in operation at the dealership for over three decades. But sadly they danced their last air dance and will no longer be bring happiness to the community.

    “It wasn’t an easy decision, but they are on the sidewalk all day flinging their arms about — it’s just a safety hazard for the public. We must do our part to get rid of this horrible pandemic,” said the dealership’s president Bob Caddy. “I gave them the option to get at least one dose of whatever vaccine they wanted by last Friday and they simply refused.”

    Both Fling and Flang we not available for comment but we were able to speak with the dealership’s custodial staff member who had this to say, “I think they should have just gotten the stupid shot, but they were just simply afraid of what it would do to their bodies — they were afraid that the jab would put a hole in their think skin and hurt their performance. So I kind of understand where they are coming from.”

    Spaghetti Thumbs undercover investigation has learned that Fling and Flang currently reside in a utility shed that is too small to dance. A GoFundMe page has been setup for the air dancers in hopes that one day they will dance again.

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