Wednesday, June 12, 2024

    Dear Walter: Do I still open the door for girls?

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    Dear Walter,

    I recently started dating again and I’m not sure if I should open the door for my date or even if I should pay for the dinner. I believe I am a feminist, because I love women, so I want to be respectful to their rights to be equal to men and do not want to offend my date by opening the door for them. Should I open the door for a women and what about car doors should I open them as well?

    Please help guide me through this confusing time of gender rights.

    — Doubtful Door Opener

    Dear Doubtful Door Opener,

    I completely understand your confusion and doubt about how to treat women today.

    I must apologize upfront because I do not have an answer or advice for you and I would be inclined to let you know that if anyone tells you they have an answer to this — they are lying.

    There is no correct answer because women want it both ways. They want to be equal to men but they also want you to open the door for them and then complain about it because they are fully capable of opening the door themselves and do not need a man to open the door for them.

    I will say this, find a woman that wants to be a woman and wants you to open the door for her. They are much harder to find these days, but lucky for you I know a small trick. Look at their markings. Find a woman that does not have any tattoos — she will most likely allow you to open the door for her. But be warned not even that is a hundred percent.

    Scratch everything I said and find a women that will open the door for you. Life will be easier that way. Good luck.

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