Wednesday, June 12, 2024

    Dear Walter: I Killed My Son’s Fish And Don’t Know a What To Do?

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    Dear Walter,

    Yesterday, while I was doing yoga in my living room I knocked over my son’s fishbowl while reaching for my kale shake. I immediately put the goldfish back into the bowl, along with some of my kale shake, but the fish died about an hour later.

    My son loved that fish and I don’t know what to do. I hid the bowl in the oven for now and told him that I sent it out to get cleaned. Should I just tell him I killed the fish or should I try and replace it. Please help me I’m just a mess over this.

    — Frightened Fish Killer

    Dear Frightened Fish Killer,

    I will make this quick. First of all I should tell you that a fish is not a pet any kid should have. You did right by putting the fish in the oven. Fish is food and that’s exactly where it belongs. I would suggest that you apologize to your son for buying him food for a pet and then go buy him a real pet like a dog.

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