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    Kardashians Buy Record Label To Date More Efficiently

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    The Kardashian conglomerate has expanded to record label owner. No Melody Music Company was purchased by the socialite trio on Monday with a list of 500 artists available to the sisters for standby dates and possible relationships.

    “I haven’t really figured out this marriage thing,” said Kim Kardashian. “My hope is that by buying this record label and now having access to a large library of eligible, or not so eligible, artists to date I hope that one day I can finally figure out this marriage thing that so many non celebrities seem to have figured out.”

    “The end of my relationship with Travis will come really fast,” said Kourtney. “Having this record label will prepare me rather quickly for my next short term relationship. I do pray that I, like my sister, figure this marriage stuff out too.”

    “To be honest I don’t know where me and Tristan stand,” said Khole. “And this will give me rapid options into a long list of talented musicians,” laughed Khole, “I tried to get my sisters to buy a basketball team — but I think this will be sufficient for now.”

    No comments have been issued from the record labels artists.

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