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    Satan Moves To San Francisco For More Hellish Place To Live

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    Looking for a place worse than his current home of Hell, Satan has temporarily relocated to San Francisco to bask in the city’s happy evil.

    Globstill, a spokesdemon for Hell, issued this statement inscribed on a vinyl record played backwards. “While hell is truly the worst place by far, Satan, along with unbelievers, will have eternity to spend there. Satan just wanted to spend some time here in a temporal place that is worse than hell.”

    While no sighting of Satan were reported, the visible signs that he is living there are certainly present. From the joyful homeless to the pleasant murders to the ever joy stealing government leaders, Satan is truly enjoying San Francisco.

    Some believe that Satan was partying with mayor London Breed late Saturday in a local nightclub and that it was perhaps Satan’s influence that led Breed to dance without a face mask.

    Spaghetti Thumbs reached out to the Mayor’s office to inquire about such rumors. No official was reached, but this recording was issued on the office phone, “Thank you for calling the Mayors office. We can not take your call as we are currently figuring out how we can avoid the rules we put in place to make your life miserable. Thank you and have a good day.”

    Spaghetti Thumbs will continue to keep on eye Satan’s activities in San Francisco.

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