Wednesday, June 12, 2024

    White House Blames George Washington For Everything Going Wrong With Country

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    WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a press conference held this morning, White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki blamed George Washington for everything that was going wrong in the Biden Administration.

    Inflation, COVID, Afghanistan, supply chain, racism, separatism, and a lack of peanut butter and jelly flavored ice cream are all rooted in the previous Washington Administration.

    “We inherited these issues,” said Psaki. “We did not create these issues. Our horrible decision making did not contribute in anyway to the issues Americans are facing today. If you look back in history you will find an enormous problem of stores not having ice cream readily available. And as for the divide in the country — we inherited that too. People in the Washington Administration were very much divided on which flavor ice cream was best —although this Administration will stand by the flavor of the month — whatever it be.”

    President Biden reached the podium to answer a few question of the matter and had this to say, “We will talk about that later,” then walked off the stage.

    Psaki further added that Biden is very committed to pushing through his agenda. “Even though the American public doesn’t want it and both the House and Senate have both rejected it — President Biden will use his executive powers to make sure all stores have peanut butter and jelly flavored ice cream.

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