Wednesday, June 12, 2024

    Winter Is Coming For You

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    WASHINGTON — President Joe Biden addressed the Nation this morning admitting that his mandates are unpopular but insisted that they are for everyone’s own good.

    “I know that I am unpopular,” said Biden. “I mean that what I am doing is unpopular, but like broccoli ice cream — you may not like it, but it’s for your own good.”

    The President then proceeded to eat one scoop of vanilla ice cream, a symbol of the message he was to finish delivering, “Know this — for the unvaccinated, the white wall will not save you. Winter is come for all the unvaccinated — death is at your doorstep. I do not deliver hope to our Nation but seek to send my minions to divide and conquer so that their will be more ice cream for those that deserve it — mainly me!”

    The president’s speech came after the 6th U.S. Court of Appeals in Cincinnati lifted a November injunction that prohibited freedom to eat ice cream.

    “People are more likely to enter an ice cream shop when they know that winter will not consume them. We have science at our fingertips and wield it as we please. Just remember for everyone that defies me or wishes freedom — winter is coming for you.”

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